Friday October 26, 2012 | 11:13 AM

Karen Morgan, comedian and chief ice cream maker at Captain Sam’s on Commercial Street, served up some mighty fine wild blueberry ice cream at the Maine Lobster Chef of the Year contest on Thursday.
She also dished up some hilarious advice.
Teenagers, here’s how NOT to apply for a job at Morgan’s store. (She swears all of these scenarios actually happened this summer.)

1. Have your parents come in and ask if I’m hiring


2. Have your parents ask for the application and have them fill it out for you.


3. Make sure you never come meet me in person. Maybe send me an email to ask if I’m hiring, then send me an email asking if I have an application online. If not, just send me a picture of yourself at the prom.


4. When you come in for an interview, make sure that the first question you ask is what is my vacation policy? You can also tell me that you have to have three days off in a row because your boyfriend lives in New Hampshire.


5. When you’re filling out the application make sure to smack your gum really loud and text people while you’re doing it. And then call your mom to ask what is your home address.


6. Also ask, “Do I have to fill out all these pages?”


7. When you’re told the position has been filled but you’re asked “Do you want to be on the waiting list?” make sure you roll your eyes and whine and stomp out the door. That’s great.


8 What not to wear for a summer job interview: Enough perfume to make me open the windows after you leave. A T-shirt so tight that I can read the tag on your bra. And a bicycle helmet that you never take off during the entire interview.


9. What not to bring to a summer job interview: Your boyfriend. Your girlfriend. Your dog. A lunchbox. Your parents. Or a haze of marijuana smoke that surounds you like pigpen.


10. And finally, when asked during a job interview “Why do you want to work in an ice cream shop?” say this: My parents want me to. I heard you get free ice cream. My boyfriend loves free ice cream. And “Is this an ice cream shop?”
 

About the Author

Meredith Goad has harvested oysters on the Chesapeake Bay, eaten reindeer in Finland and sipped hot chai in the Himalayas. She writes the weekly Soup to Nuts column and enjoys a good cocktail.

Meredith can be contacted at 791-6332 or mgoad@pressherald.com
On Twitter: @meredithgoad

Susan Axelrod's food writing career began in the kitchen; she owned a restaurant and catering business before turning to journalism more than a decade ago. To relax, she bakes, gardens and hikes with her husband and their two dogs. A newcomer to Portland, she is an online content producer for the Press Herald.

Susan can be contacted at 791-6310 or saxelrod [at] pressherald.com.
On Twitter: @susansaxelrod

Wendy Almeida and her family have a smattering of livestock and a summer garden. After 10 years of her kids being involved in 4-H, she's finally accepted the term "hobby farm" to describe her family's work at sustainable living. These days her morning starts with milking a goat before heading into the office for her day job as an assistant editor for features.

Wendy can be contacted at wea [at] mainetoday.com or on Twitter @wea1021.


Subscribe to the
Maine a la Carte RSS

Previous entries

May 2013

April 2013

March 2013

February 2013

January 2013

December 2012

More

November 2012

October 2012

September 2012

August 2012

July 2012

June 2012

May 2012

April 2012

March 2012

Further Discussion

Here at PressHerald.com we value our readers and are committed to growing our community by encouraging you to add to the discussion. To ensure conscientious dialogue we have implemented a strict no-bullying policy. To participate, you must follow our Terms of Use.

Questions about the article? Add them below and we’ll try to answer them or do a follow-up post as soon as we can. Technical problems? Email them to us with an exact description of the problem. Make sure to include:
  • type of computer or mobile device your are using
  • exact operating system and browser you are viewing the site on (TIP: You can easily determine your operating system here.)
Prefer to respond privately? Email us here.