Nemitz: Full exposure of their … principles
By Bill Nemitz bnemitz@mainetoday.com
Staff Writer
It's going to be a busy week for Portland Police Chief James Craig.
On Thursday, President Obama comes to town – and with him the inevitable jawing match between those who think he's a modern-day messiah and those who think he's a radical Muslim with a fake birth certificate.
But if you want to witness a real challenge in crowd control, take a peek at what Craig and his department will face Saturday afternoon in the heart of downtown Portland.
It's called "Portland's First Ever Female-Bodied and Allied Topless Adventure." Put more simply, an expected 30 or more women, along with "allied" male sympathizers, plan to walk from Longfellow Square down Congress Street to Tommy's Park at the top of the Old Port with nothing on from the waist up.
Reaching to dial 911?
Don't bother. It's all perfectly legal.
"There's no law against it," Craig said upon hearing about the event for the first time Friday.
Still, he couldn't help but ask, "What's this about?"
It's simple, explained organizer Ty MacDowell, 20, of Westbrook, in an interview Friday.
On a personal level, MacDowell likes to swim during the summer at East End Beach and has always yearned to do so topless. Beyond that, she and her fellow adventurers want to expose what they see as a glaring double standard.
"You see a man walking down the street (with no shirt on), and it's just accepted – that's part of society," MacDowell said. "It's not the same for us – and it should be."
McDowell stressed that Saturday's stroll is not intended to be a full-blown protest (too confrontational) or political demonstration (too organized). In fact, no advance publicity whatsoever was planned before a Facebook posting about the walk found its way into the latest issue of Portland's bi-monthly West End News.
("Full topless nudity is strongly encouraged," the posting advised. "But for the more modest, pretty electrical tape will be in supply.")
"It's not a march," MacDowell said. "We're just going to take a casual stroll down Congress Street and see what happens."
Probably not much, at least from a legal standpoint.
Calls last week to Portland City Hall and the Cumberland County District Attorney's office confirmed that while it is illegal for men and women to expose their genitals in public, local and state laws contain no such prohibition on uncovered breasts – male or female. (Although, considering some of the men who insist on parading around topless, one could argue that there should be.)
Maine, in fact, is one of a handful of "top-free" states that have no laws banning breast exposure, according to the national organization gotopless.org. The group lists the others as Hawaii, New York, Ohio, Texas and the "coast of California."
Nadine Gary, 45, of San Diego, a real estate manager with a heavy French accent who helped found gotopless.org in 2007, said last week that she had not heard of the Portland event.
"But I'm happy you're telling me about it!" she added cheerfully.
Gary said her organization, which plans to hold National Go Topless Day on Aug. 22, already is well aware of last year's flap over the Grand View Topless Coffee Shop in Vassalboro, not to mention the ruckus 12 years ago over the young woman in Newport who insisted on letting it all hang out whenever she mowed her lawn. (A subsequent effort to pass a local ordinance forcing her to cover up was soundly defeated.)
"It's comfort. It's fun. It's freedom," Gary replied when asked why going topless is so important. "It doesn't mean that at every single moment, I'm going to take off my shirt. But sometimes it's hot and you can take off your shirt. Why can't I have that option?"
For the record, it should be noted that gotopless.org is a spin-off of the Raelian Movement, which holds that we were all created by little human-like creatures from outer space who plan on returning in 2035. No word yet on what they will – or won't – be wearing.
But we digress.
Here in Maine, organizer MacDowell conceded that April might be a tad early for Portland's First Ever Female-Bodied and Allied Topless Adventure. But it won't be the last such event, she promised, and she fully expects the turnouts to go up with the temperatures.
MacDowell also understands that not everyone will be thrilled with Saturday's spectacle.
"I want the event to be social and casual," she said. "I don't want it to be, like, aggressive – unless it has to be."
Translation: Lay a hand on anyone walking topless, MacDowell promised, "and you'll get punched in the face."
Which brings us back to Chief Craig.
"I think the only thing we can do is monitor it to make sure that one, they're not interfered with and two, they don't create a public disruption," Craig said. "It certainly will be something that will cause a reaction of some sort."
Still, we can all rest assured that Portland's finest will have the situation, shall we say, covered.
Mused Craig, "I'm wondering how many officers are going to volunteer for this detail."
Columnist Bill Nemitz can be contacted at 791-6323 or at:
bnemitz@mainetoday.com
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31 COMMENTS
OldGuy said...
The biggest boobs we see will be those sanctimonious smutty-minded "guardians of public morals" who come to whine and moan about the end of the world.
March 28, 2010 at 12:55 AM Report abuse
Cartman said...
I can only imagine what the comments on this will be today....but let me be the first to fully "support" and "uplift" this idea...all kidding aside,that being said,I think the organizer might wish she hadn't done this.....I think I can safely say that this not being illegal will be a surprise for MOST people....and as such,you're most assuredly going to have at least one uptight State legislator scrambling to get a law on the books in Maine.If they're beside themselves over the motorcycle noise issue,these same people will be abhorred at what they consider public indecency.
March 28, 2010 at 6:08 AM Report abuse
heyjoe said...
People will do anything for their 15 minutes of fame....How utterly stupid and mundane!!! what a bunch of "boobs".....
March 28, 2010 at 6:32 AM Report abuse
heyjoe said...
Some people will do anything for their 15 minutes of fame....How stupid and mundane is this act? What a bunch of "b@@bs"....
March 28, 2010 at 7:19 AM Report abuse
jude said...
Whoa Cartman, you couldn't be more wrong. I'm adamantly opposed to loud motorcycles but I couldn't be more tolerant of young woman walking the streets of Portland topless. Go for it!
March 28, 2010 at 8:32 AM Report abuse
yoda said...
kinda chilly for that. Someone could lose an eye!
March 28, 2010 at 8:33 AM Report abuse
Justincase said...
This crowd could certainly become a handful. I hope they don't take any wooden nipples, oops I mean nickels.
March 28, 2010 at 8:51 AM Report abuse
eWFyZGJpcmQ%3D said...
all we need is one lady in her 70s joining up with them and it'll be all over
March 28, 2010 at 9:00 AM Report abuse
MainelyJack said...
Jude...it won't young women with perky breasts. It will be the pruny and saggy crowd who would be better fully clother at all times. They do this in San Fran with some regularity although they prefer full nudity out there. The result is the same...old babes and guys with guts that cover their nether regions and just make a specacle of themselves. If this is an event worth coverning as a newspaper, I assume there will be pictures also.... No? How hypocritcal Mr. Conner.
March 28, 2010 at 9:17 AM Report abuse
Scommentname said...
Let's hope that when the space ship comes to visit they'll take Bill Nemitz along with them (and a load of Maine hand-me-down junk) to chronicle a humanitarian trip to the next planet or two. Hopefully several light years away.
March 28, 2010 at 9:40 AM Report abuse
Mainedog said...
Another piece of CRAP from Nemitz! It's a wonder he hasn't been downsized! Nemitz writes only two things CRAP or REPUBLICAN BASHING CRAP! Gee too bad he can't be voted out!!!!!
March 28, 2010 at 3:18 PM Report abuse
ACHILLES said...
Rest assured there will be nothing worth perusing in that bunch. Flapping cow tongue breasts and snaggly pit hair. Lets see if the PPH has the 'courage' to post any pictures. I think not. Cowards and hypocrites like the majority of the media.
March 28, 2010 at 8:53 PM Report abuse
limeade said...
Make sure to sign the "Women's constitutional right to go topless in public" petition. The online version has 2556 signatures. Google finds it fast Also be sure and come to the 3rd annual National Gotopless Day protest this August. It will take place in several cities.
March 28, 2010 at 9:19 PM Report abuse
HesterPrynne said...
What a hoot! Reminds me of the bra burning days. More power to ya 'girls'!
March 29, 2010 at 8:04 AM Report abuse
grumblestilt said...
"I think not. Cowards and hypocrites like the majority of the media." It's funny how some speak up for freedom and government limitations only when it serves their own ideology and not others'. My question is the way this could potentially affect Maine's tourism economy - for better or worse. It could be this might steer some potential summer beach visitors away. Or it could bring more to our gorgeous coastline. Sure, it's probably a toss-up, but it seems that the way to have it increase our tourism is by welcoming anyone with open arms. Whining about people who are different than we are is a sure way to hurt the tourism business in Maine: you might as well put up signs that say "If you're not one of us, you're not welcome here."
March 29, 2010 at 8:19 AM Report abuse
grumblestilt said...
"People will do anything for their 15 minutes of fame....How utterly stupid and mundane!!! what a bunch of "boobs"...." It's a good point: why should we talk about things like equality or think about how the law doesn't treat men and women the same when it comes to issues of sexuality and how that might or might not work under the 14th Amendment which ensures equal protection under the law. Instead, shouldn't we be talking about celebrities and our favorite sports heroes? After all, we have a black president, so clearly all racism and sexism in American must have already been solved. Seriously - When was the last time someone spit on a civil rights activist and shouted racist slurs at him? Or at a Congressmen for that matter? Most of our memories don't go back that far.
March 29, 2010 at 8:24 AM Report abuse
LordNelson said...
Roll out the Homeland Job Security Tank Chief Craig!
March 29, 2010 at 8:39 AM Report abuse
WestbrookJ said...
Wow! Too many people with too much time on their hands! Just keep chipping away, and soon it will look just like a beach in any other Third World country.
March 29, 2010 at 9:40 AM Report abuse
Monadnock said...
"Maine, in fact, is one of a handful of states that have no laws banning breast exposure" It's heartening that at least in some respects, Maine is less of an overbearing Big Nanny state than others. Perhaps some of the girls in this march would look better fully clothed. But they'll still be more pleasant to see than the sanctimonious nitwits who will likely be outraged by this event.
March 29, 2010 at 10:03 AM Report abuse
grumblestilt said...
Freedom shouldn't be defined by how you look.
March 29, 2010 at 10:55 AM Report abuse
Hawkeye9909 said...
This must be part of the President Obama stimulus package for Maine.
March 29, 2010 at 11:15 AM Report abuse
laloo said...
If its not illegal, why is such a big fuss being made. There is nothing to be gained except for sensationalized media coverage. I hope its cold as h*ll. It will show how impractical and ridiculous this display is. Why not just take your shirt off on a hot day, if that is the right you wish to have? I would prefer everyone to cover up when in a public way. Nothing grosser than bumping into some sweaty dude with no shirt on.
March 29, 2010 at 1:27 PM Report abuse
BillyFiske said...
What makes you think they will all be women? Transgenders have a right to be topless too. What you see may not be what you get.
March 29, 2010 at 1:40 PM Report abuse
dumasilook said...
if its not illegal to go topless why are they complaining about not being able to do so on east end beach
March 29, 2010 at 2:19 PM Report abuse
heyjoe said...
DUMB
March 29, 2010 at 7:53 PM Report abuse
Wingnut said...
How convenient for Ms. Fernandes to have Ms. Lauber-Oren present with a video camera "for the first time." If anyone is owed an apology it is for the public ambush Ms. York received during a selectmen's meeting. If that wasn't an ambush, I don't know what else it could be called. The fact that this is still newsworthy is a joke, just like the email she forwarded. Had I received the email, I probably would have laughed a bit and forwarded it, depending on how big a laugh it elicited. Gasp, I'm a sinner! I laughed at the Bush jokes, the Cheney and Gore jokes, and even the Palin jokes. Ms. Fernandes needs to crawl back under the rock she came from. Much ado for nothing.
March 31, 2010 at 12:32 PM Report abuse
Adam180 said...
Living up north is such a hoot! People get so riled up about minor racial stuff up here. You want to see real racism? Go down South were both races still choose self segregation in society! The lady didn't even create the cartoon! Just forwarded it. Besides, the PC/liberal/evolution crowd always tells us there was no God. We evolved from apes in Africa. Blacks are from Africa and probably evolved first before Caucasians were on the planet? They do have some primitive looking features. It's reality. Plus, Obama is as much White as he is black, and it wasn't a problem making chimp references to Bush, so what's the problem? Get a grip! It's just a joke that doesn't fit the politically corrects taste in humor.
March 31, 2010 at 1:06 PM Report abuse
fool-in-rain said...
Ah yes, the hippies are alive and well. I'm surprised they aren't ending their march at Whole Foods. Just because we choose not to go and do something foolish like this, that automatically means we're "uptight" and "overly moralistic". No, we're just not retarded.
April 2, 2010 at 9:47 AM Report abuse
fool-in-rain said...
Ah yes, the hippies are alive and well. I'm surprised they aren't ending their march at Whole Foods. Just because we choose not to go and do something foolish like this, that automatically means we're "uptight" and "overly moralistic". No, we're just not stupid.
April 2, 2010 at 10:01 AM Report abuse
henryelm said...
east end beach; the new french riviera!!! what a HOOT!!!
April 3, 2010 at 7:46 PM Report abuse
stinkyspot said...
I just want to see pictures.
April 5, 2010 at 12:33 PM Report abuse