Time for political trivia. For each correct answer, treat yourself to a beer. If you get question three right, upgrade to a nice whiskey. If you miss any of the rest (because, by then, the pattern should be pretty obvious), ask the bouncer to throw you out. You’re obviously drunk.

1. In 2007, which Maine politician called for fast action to combat global warming, saying, “Time is not on our side,” but in 2011, opposed allowing the federal Environmental Protection Agency to regulate greenhouse gases?

a. Republican State Treasurer Bruce Poliquin

b. Democratic U.S. Rep. Chellie Pingree

c. GOP U.S. Sen. Olympia Snowe

(The answer is Snowe, who’s up for re-election, which probably has nothing to do with her pulling a one-eighty.)

2. Which of our state’s esteemed pols supported the first round of Bush tax cuts in 2001, opposed the second round in 2003, but fought to preserve those reductions when they were scheduled to expire in 2010?

a. Democratic Congressman Mike Michaud

b. Republican State Treasurer Bruce Poliquin

c. GOP U.S. Sen. Olympia Snowe

(The answer is Snowe, who, as I may have mentioned, is running for re-election.)

3. Who told a radio interviewer earlier this month, “That was a mistake, by the way …. That was a dumb thing to do”?

a. Snowe, explaining why she used to fight against reductions in Medicaid payments to low-income families

b. Poliquin, on showing up to testify about a business expansion before the Phippsburg Planning Board, an apparent violation of the Maine Constitution

c. Republican state chairman Charlie Webster, on screwing up the party’s presidential straw vote

d. GOP U.S. Sen. Susan Collins, on deciding to get married

(Ha! This one really is Poliquin.)

4. In 2004, who was named America’s Funniest Senator by the comedy website Zug.com?

a. Snowe, for a joke about … you don’t want to know

b. Republican state Sen. Jon Courtney, for chickening out of challenging Rep. Pingree in 2012

c. Patrick Calder, a merchant mariner from Portland, for deciding to run against Pingree

(As difficult as it is to believe, it’s Snowe. In reality, Zug.com isn’t all that funny, either.)

5. Which of Maine’s political leaders had this to say last August about the political atmosphere in this country: “People are no longer willing to talk with people with whom they disagree, so it’s harder to work through the disagreements and the impediments,” but earlier this month addressed a Republican gathering in Bangor, saying, “We have to thwart the assault by the president and the Democrats on the private sector” and adding, “[the Obama] administration has embarked on a regulatory rampage”?

a. Republican state Rep. Dana Dow, explaining why he lost a special election for a safe GOP state Senate seat

b. Chewbacca

c. Snowe

(It’s Snowe, who also proclaimed in 2005, “Ideology leads to a scorched-earth policy or to political isolation. You’ve got to work across the aisle to get things done” and in 2007, “But we’ve seen more polarization towards the right of the political spectrum, and I think that hasn’t served the [Republican] party well” and in 2009, “It’s not healthy for the country to have parties with polar opposite views without that bridge that you need to build consensus” and in 2010, “You are in this partisan divide and as one who’s straddling it … you just have to stay focused, don’t lose your values and do what you’ve always done.” If you picked Chewbacca, he’s not a Maine politician. Also, you’re an idiot.)

6. Which member of Maine’s congressional delegation voted with his or her party 91 percent of the time in 2011, after having earned a partisan-loyalty rating of just 69 percent in the previous Congress?

a. Snowe

b. Chewbacca

(See, this isn’t so hard.)

7. What woman U.S. senator promised in 2004 to oppose any Supreme Court nominee who favored overturning Roe v. Wade, but voted to confirm John Roberts (who opposes Roe and once wrote a brief arguing against equal pay for equal work) and Samuel Alito (who once ruled that a woman needed her husband’s permission to get an abortion); in 2011, voted for a budget that included a ban on federal funding for Planned Parenthood; and is currently supporting a measure to allow any employer to prohibit coverage of birth control in company health-insurance plans?

a. Poliquin (dressed in drag)

b. Mitt Romney (also dressed in drag)

c. Snowe

(The correct answer is the one not dressed in drag.)

8. Who’s tended throughout her career to tilt one way during election years and quite another in off years?

a. every politician

b. including Snowe

c. except maybe Poliquin, who’s consistently over the top

(The answer is “all of the above.”)


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