Back when I was a kid, my buddies and I loved to play “Combat!”

We took the name from the ABC series starring Vic Morrow as Sgt. Chip Saunders and Rick Jason as 2nd Lt. Gil Hanley.

They led their seasoned squad of soldiers across the battlefields of World War II with grit, courage and, when necessary, quiet heroism.

We darted behind trees and rocks in our backyards.

They used M1 semi-automatic rifles and M1A1 Thompson submachine guns, or “Tommy guns,” to cut down the dastardly Germans.

We used pieces of wood. And to make it more realistic, each of us spent hours honing our own “FFFFFTTT” – that spitty, exhaling sound that, to us at least, perfectly mimicked the deadly discharge of rapid fire.

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Sure, it was fantasy, but it was our fantasy.

And, sure, we eventually outgrew it.

What happened in Orlando early Sunday morning was no fantasy.

Yet another national tragedy was brought to us by a madman with an assault rifle – killing 49, wounding more than 50 and reigniting the debate between those of us who think these firearms in the hands of civilians are nothing short of insanity and those who worship at the altar of military-style weaponry.

Shotguns or hunting rifles? No problem.

Handguns for target shooting or personal protection? Hey, if that’s what floats your boat, be careful and keep them away from the kids.

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But “modern sporting rifles,” as the National Rifle Association so euphemistically calls them? Manufactured and marketed to look like, sound like and feel like the same military hardware most recently used in Iraq and Afghanistan?

Why?

Here’s my theory: Some guys still like to play Army.

Take for example, the Sig Sauer MCX, the rifle used by Omar Mateen inside the Pulse nightclub last weekend.

A recent review of the weapon on the website “thetruthaboutguns.com” notes the Sig Sauer MCX was first developed for the U.S. military’s special forces as a rifle “that’s as quiet as an MP5 (and) as deadly as an AK-47.”

“My biggest concern: would Sig Sauer translate the mil(itary) spec masterpiece into a useful semi-automatic civilian model?” writes reviewer Nick Leghorn. “They certainly started on the right foot …”

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Indeed. A 30-second promotional video for the rifle shows a guy dressed in black and wearing wraparound sunglasses, running through a foggy, eerily lit set firing at what vaguely appear to be human targets.

“Shooter, make ready,” the narrator intones as the gunman springs into action. “The Sig MCX is here, and it’s unlike anything you’ve seen or heard … It’s the start of a new era.”

In another video, then-Sig Sauer President Kevin Brittingham explains, “The Sig MCX was designed to meet the DOD (Department of Defense) requirement for a weapon that would be as compact as possible, that focused on signature reduction and (was) as quiet as possible.”

And in yet another video, Sig Sauer Defense Program Manager Robby Johnson notes, “All of the employees here respect the military and law enforcement and understand their lives are on the line.”

Let’s set aside the irony that Mateen used his Sig Sauer MCX to shoot a police officer in the head amid Sunday’s carnage. What does any of the company’s hype have to do with a civilian gun owner?

Easy. It fuels the fantasy. It enables grown men, the vast majority of whom haven’t a clue how the horrors of actual combat truly look, sound and smell, to pick up a warlike weapon and squeeze off 10, 20 maybe even 30 rounds of pure, unadulterated daydream.

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Take a look at the current crop of firearms classifieds in Uncle Henry’s Weekly Sell or Swap It Guide.

You won’t find many references to the Sig Sauer MCX – it just hit the civilian market in 2015. But you will find plenty of other military-inspired assault rifles, most notably the many variations of the AR-15 now synonymous with mass killings in Newtown, Aurora and San Bernardino.

Reads one Uncle Henry’s ad: “For sale or trade: DPMS AR-15, .223/5.56. iron sights, hard case, will come with one 30-round GI magazine. This is my ‘spare’ AR.”

A “spare” AR-15? As if one isn’t enough?

Then there are those looking to get in on the action.

One advertiser offers a 2002 Jeep Grand Cherokee in exchange for a new AR-15.

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Another has a 17-foot Baretta inboard-outboard boat, with trailer, that has a cracked motor block but still runs. Yours in exchange for a Colt AR-15 SP1.

Think about that. A beautiful day on a lake in Maine in exchange for a few minutes of boom, boom, boom and a paper target riddled with bullet holes. Are we having fun yet?

As I write this, Democrats in the U.S. Senate are engaged in a filibuster aimed at getting the Republican majority to move, if only an inch, toward expanded background checks on gun buyers, or at least keeping guns out of the hands of those on the terrorist watch list.

I’ve yet to hear a word about resurrecting the nation’s assault weapons ban, which expired in 2004 and grows more and more faint, like that shooter in the Sig Sauer video, with each passing year.

Meaning all those military-style weapons, with their quick-change, 30-round magazines, will keep multiplying … and multiplying … and multiplying …

And as they do, they will tragically (and legally) fall into the hands of the Omar Mateens, the Adam Lanzas, the James Holmeses and all the other ticking time bombs whose human toll is tied directly to the ferocity of their firepower.

All this because too many Americans, the vast majority of them white men, consider it their God-given right to play with the same types of guns that the real-life soldiers do.

If only they’d just grow up.

 


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