As a half-civic-minded (and half-witted) columnist, it is my duty to offer an appropriately patriotic theme for this Independence Day. To that end, I would like to focus on that all important celebratory element: dessert.

Let’s start with ice cream – which flavors and colors best represent our fervor for the Fourth? I guess you could start with strawberry, vanilla and blueberry. But, no. My tastes are more along the less obvious, like red velvet, white chocolate (or French vanilla in a pinch) and peanut butter chunk. Yeah, yeah – I know peanut butter isn’t blue, but my deep commitment to consuming it must earn some points for patriotism… or gluttony. Besides, there is no blue food, except maybe blue cotton candy, and you don’t want to know how it gets that way.

On to more decorative Independence Day delights, not that there is anything “light” about them. Anyone who has flipped through the summer issue of a magazine, followed the link to summer dessert recipes, or perused Pinterest for ideas has seen more than one version of the much-hailed flag cake. I’ve never made it but I’ve been told there is cream cheese and sugar involved, so I’m already a fan.

The cake is decked out with strawberries that have been carefully aligned against a background of whipped cream to illustrate stripes. A cluster of blueberry “stars” arranged in the corner completes the picture of our country’s flag. It is truly a delectable sight to eat. I mean, to see.

Yours truly will admit to not being the neatest when it comes to dessert preparation. My cake would look more like the scene of a gory surrender than a flag. The kids did not beg to have me decorate their birthday cakes. In fact, once they could express themselves, they almost always requested an ice cream cake – something their mother would not have a hand in decorating.

But we’re concentrating on the upcoming holiday, not past disregard for my decorating skills. We’ll save that for another time.

During my research for this week’s column (it’s not often I have a reasonable excuse to stare at food with a high sugar content), I came across a red, white and blue trifle. Like that popular flag cake, meticulously sliced strawberries stood out against the fluffy white whipped cream background, and a triangle of sweet, shiny blueberries eclipsed this patriotic delight. It almost makes me want to cry… partially because there’s no chocolate involved.

Many people don’t realize that, even though Congress officially adopted the Declaration of Independence on July 4, 1776, its signing was not completed until sometime in August. I can’t help but wonder if it might have happened a little sooner if the delegates were persuaded to stick around with a homemade cherry pie or a gooey cake.

In place of red, white and blue on the Fourth of July, my gang is content to hang around the fire pit toasting marshmallows to set up with graham crackers and a small slab of chocolate (you knew I’d find my way back to chocolate). There’s nothing like pledging my sweet tooth’s allegiance to those first s’mores of summer.

Happy Fourth of July to everyone. Oh say, can you see where I put the marshmallow tongs?