DEAR HARRIETTE: I lent my friend an older laptop charger that I have because hers was broken and she needed it for work. When she gave it back to me, it did not work. I mentioned this to her, and she said she noticed it was older so it would probably break soon. She had this charger for 5 days, and gave it back to me broken!

I told my friend that she should pay for a new charger; they cost $80, and mine worked when I gave it to her. She told me the most she would do is a third of the price. Should I take the deal? I can’t believe a “friend” would get so aggressive about money like this. – You Break It, You Buy It, Denver

DEAR YOU BREAK IT, YOU BUY IT: Ask your friend if your old charger worked a third of the way to helping her complete her work, or if she was actually able to use her computer. That might get her to thinking rationally. Tell your friend you will be happy if she can find a used one that works that she could buy for her suggested price. Essentially, you expect her to replace your charger with one that works. Tell her that you are shocked at her attitude. When you rescued her with your charger, she happily took it. That she returned it to you broken – without saying anything – is unconscionable.

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DEAR HARRIETTE: My children are in elementary school, and I have been reading mommy blogs about how to incorporate children into chores. I have tried to make washing dishes into a fun game, but I get a lackluster response from my two boys. The same goes for other cleaning and outdoor work. I explained that if they help, mommy has more time to have fun. They didn’t care. Are some kids just less inclined to do chores or help around the house? I know I never got a break from sweeping and dishes growing up. – Sweeping Sons, Chevy Chase, Maryland

DEAR SWEEPING SONS: Think back on what motivation your parents used to get you to do chores. I doubt they talked about the incentive of fun. I suggest that you teach your sons that it is the responsibility of every member of a household to contribute to the maintenance of the house, inside and out. This is not optional, and it is not so that you can have more fun. As you see, that can backfire because children are focused on having fun for themselves.

Give your boys specific, manageable tasks to complete. Let them know that they will not be allowed to play outside or inside, including playing computer games, until their chores are complete. You will then have to be true to your word. If the dishes aren’t washed or the yard work is incomplete, make sure that the TV is off, the video games are powered down, the phones are in your possession and basically that anything that they would consider fun is out of reach. Consequences help to drive actions.

— Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to [email protected] or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.