DEAR ABBY: I’m a single mom. My child’s father has refused to take any responsibility since before the baby was born. I never cut ties because I’m sure my son will someday long for and want to know his real father.

Even though he renounced his responsibility, he took it back and said he’d try to be there for my child. We are geographically many miles apart, and I no longer expect or hope for any possibility of a reconciliation.

But Abby, he never calls to ask how our child is. What should I do? Should I cut ties with him forever, or must I continue to be the one to message him informing him about the milestones?

— CONFUSED SINGLE MOM IN JAPAN

DEAR CONFUSED: A man who “tries” to be responsible for his children pays at least token child support to ensure that they are fed, clothed and educated. Nowhere in your letter did you indicate that your child’s father has done that — or intends to.

If you want to stay in touch so your child will have an address to reach him when he’s older, I think that’s laudable. But if you’re expecting he will suddenly develop an interest, the pattern that has been set seems pretty well established, so don’t get your hopes up.

DEAR ABBY: We’re in the middle of a dispute with my mother-in-law. She insisted on using place cards at our family’s Thanksgiving dinner to indicate where she wanted us to sit. I felt it was controlling because it was only a small group of people. When I asked her why she needed a seating plan, she said it would be “fun.”

While it ended up that we all sat where we wanted and everyone conversed nicely, she said her holiday was “ruined” because I ridiculed her for wanting to use place cards. What is your opinion?

— MUSICAL CHAIRS IN NEW ENGLAND

DEAR MUSICAL CHAIRS: One of the perks of hosting a sit-down dinner is having the privilege of controlling the seating, regardless of whether guests are friends or relatives. That it was a “family dinner” is beside the point. For you to have made such a scene that you ruined your hostess’s evening was rude, and you owe her an apology. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com