You can learn a lot about a community lying flat on your back at a Red Cross blood drive.

Our Libby-Mitchell American Legion Post 76 baseball team held its ninth annual drive this past week at St. Nick Church on Route 1 in Scarborough.

Here are things seen and heard publicly (often by loud friends of the team!). Here also are various slings and arrows of outrageous fortune hurled at yours truly by assorted miscreants, hangers-on, stoppers-by at the same event. (It is telling who will take advantage of a person lying prone with a needle in his arm …).

These blood drives are long days; people spend many hours on their feet. Assisting the Libby-Mitchell team all day at front desk was Grant Worthing, 86 years young – it’s good to have some fresh recruits. Joyce Joy, 75 years young, walked the floor all day with no complaints, assisting donors – must be nice to have young wheels! She was a registered nurse for 30 years at Togus, former site of Legion baseball state playoffs; at this blood drive, that is like having resided near Mecca!

There were two blood drives in Scarborough this week – one at Cabela’s, and ours at St. Nick Church, 350 Route 1. A player said, “They stole some of our donors!” Love that competitiveness. We try to get 50 donors each year at February drive. Some of our repeat donors went to Cabela’s a day earlier because it was more convenient. Had to tell player, no, do not go hunt them down!

Between the two drives in Scarborough, 62 donors. Yay!

Speaking of competitiveness, Scott Worthing, son of Grant Worthing, has been accused of turning the act of giving blood into a NASCAR event; allegations are that he is eager to produce the allotted amount in the shortest time possible; same allegations made against Scarborough Police Chief Robert Moulton.

Worthing’s response to charge: “Guilty.”

Chief Moulton issued a denial, through a spokesman.

Worthing added, as I lay prone: “That’s OK … you’re slow … we’ll all wait.” Worthing, Scarborough High School ’75, drew laughter from those nearby.

His comments seemed gratuitous, harsh, and designed, perhaps, to lower my self-esteem.

Speaking of Chief Moulton, his son, Chris, is a rock star. His band, Cambiata, has a new CD out. The group is packing the local clubs late at night (OK, somebody told me that). Bull Moose has the CD on its “Hot List” this week. I told Alan Peoples, my next-door neighbor, that I was surprised that the chief, a childhood chum, had not asked me to help his son with singing or musical advice. Alan said: “Oh, I am sure it is only that he does not want to impose on your relationship.” Again, nearby donors and volunteers laughed.

I found Alan’s comments gratuitious, harsh, and designed, perhaps, to lower my self-esteem.

The new Scarborough town manager, Tom Hall, has a high-school-age son who played baseball in Rockland, where the family lived previously. A donor asked whether those affiliated with the Libby-Mitchell Junior Legion team or Senior Legion summer team could get a break on property tax bills based on how much playing time his son gets in the future. The answer: No. Were he a blood donor and helped us reach our goal of 50, we could perhaps talk.

Ken Dolloff, age 88, D-Day veteran and 50-year member of the Libby-Mitchell Post baseball committee, congratulated our team on winning the Zone Championship in summer 2008. Credit goes to Head Coach Will Sanborn, Assistant Coach Jim Cronin of SHS, and Assistant Coach Marc Sawyer of Bonny Eagle High School.

Ken wanted to know whether the boys were being “well behaved.” He remembers the 1980s and ’90s when there were some problems off the field. I said all is well. Sanborn appears to have a Knucklehead Zero-Tolerance Policy. Cronin, meanwhile, is also a hockey coach. There is always the suggestion of physical force being available with these hockey guys; that is sometimes a good thing.

Buck Knight was upset about the Bernie Madoff financial investment scandal on Wall Street. Heretofore, he had been silent about it. The change? Lists of alleged defrauded investors this week became available. One of the names on the list? Former L.A. Dodger great Sandy Koufax. “He’s gone too far now,” said Knight of Madoff.

Knight then went off on a tangent about Koufax’s statistics, his dominance in the 1960s, his World Series performances (other than against Baltimore in the ’66 Series, compadre). He eventually had to be restrained and seated by our security guards.

Rick Libby wanted to know where Jimmy Graffam was. Libby is always asking where Jimmy Graffam is. Graffam is former BEHS hoop coach, and former Saint Joseph’s College baseball coach, and former Westbrook College baseball and basketball coach. Graffam said in 1990 at an SHS boys basketball game being coached by his younger brother, Scott: “Basketball, well played, is a combination of a track meet and knife fight.” Truer words were never spoken. They’re even more poignant than those of French philosophers always quoted in Raymond Chandler l940s crime novels.

Speaking of track meets on the hard court, SHS girls basketball Coach Jim Seavey got kudos. His team had just played Biddeford or someone. The newspaper story, probably written by the new Gray Eminence of Maine Sports Journalism, Tom Chard, paid the ultimate compliment in Graffam World: “It was a girls basketball game, but the track coaches would have enjoyed it!”

Three people said they came because they saw the blood drive publicized on the electronic Reader Board outside the Scarborough Police Station. Mucho thanks to our favorite D.A.R.E. officer, Joe G., for his help there. He is a popular guy. No better way to get a message out in town – none, actually, unless you tell an SHS student and then ask him not to tell anybody.

Jim Rouse and Chris Bernard lined up SHS player volunteers. Nice work, boys. Bernard, headed to UMO in the fall, was the Johnny Cumberland Award winner on our Legion team last summer as best pitcher. Rouse, headed to St. Joe’s in the fall, was the James E. Dillon Award winner as the best hitter. The post is proud; its motto in sports is: “Better human beings make better baseball players.” Exhibits A and B, right there.

I told Ed Too Tall MacColl that story as he walked in to give blood. I said I supported the coaches’ decision to honor Rouse for his bat. MacColl repeated a line he has used, surgically, in the past: “I had understood that the only thing you knew about good hitters was that you were not one yourself.”

I found the comment gratuitious, harsh and designed, perhaps, to lower my self-esteem.

Ryan Mancini and Brett Caiazzi held down the fort early. Each zoned in on donors, providing drinks and snacks. If they can turn two with the same precision, things look good next summer for the 76ers. Mancini was on the roster of the Libby-Mitchell Junior Legion team, coached by Mike Scott, Bud Sutyak and Rick Libby.

Bud has given blood in the past. It can get ugly, however, with jokes being traded about lawyers, sharks, river bottoms and football players playing too many games years ago in the age before helmets were used.

Dave Dolloff spread the word at the post, as usual, about the drive. It’s interesting to talk with some post members about the Iraq War. When I first became team general manager in 2000, I assumed they were all die-hard war supporters of any conflict, current or contemplated. Not so. Ask Dolloff, Duane Jutting, Don McLewin, Phil Ceaser and other guys. They’re careful and cautious. A possible read: Once you have been to battle, as they all have, you want to make sure there is a really good reason to send anybody else into battle. Makes sense. Reassuring to newbies.

Somebody had fun about a statement by former presidential candidate Mitt Romney, who said during the campaign he had not gone to Vietnam, but kind of wished, now, he had. “Find another way to beef up the resume, Mr. Romney,” was one comment.

Regarding President Barack Obama, there was seriousness. “We wish him well. We need him to do well.” Makes sense.

Concerning a comment recently by former Vice President Dick Cheney that he sees a “high probability” of a nuclear or biological attack on the United States at some point, there were only head shakes. “He should take a year off – or maybe two. Go fishing, say nothing.”

I found the former vice president’s comments gratuitous, harsh and designed, perhaps, to lower my life expectancy.

Blood bag full. My time is up. I thank you for yours.