The old saying in this country is that you shouldn’t talk about religion or politics.

The thinking behind the adage is that those topics are so ripe for argument that they will produce hard feelings and not much else. These days it seems as if the list of topics you shouldn’t talk about is growing longer and longer, as people grow less and less able to have a conversation about issues without devolving into arguments.

You see it during election season, when candidates spewing rhetoric fire up their political bases. You see it when social issues are raised, and when there is talk of bias and discrimination based on race and gender. Conversation about money, about beliefs — heck, even topics such as entertainment — brings about animosity.

The talking heads that pepper our consciousness with commentary through a variety of media channels certainly stoke those flames, but we need to put a stop to it. All it’s doing is creating a country of angry people who can’t work with each other. Our population is becoming more fragmented, less connected and unable to move to a better future for all.

It’s seen on our opinion pages. Most recently, issues such as the Wiscasset airport and Chewonki campground being at odds over the proposed airport improvement plan that would remove a number of trees from the campground, and the upcoming bear baiting, hounding and trapping referendum coming in November, have produced very passionate, fervent pleas. The opposing sides are just getting angrier and more emotional, and it’s not going to make things better.

This may seem like a pie-in-the-sky notion, but it is possible to stop the flood of anger pouring forth. But, it will take an effort from everyone to make it happen, an investment from all people to choose to be able to talk with others with differing opinions without getting angry. It’s not easy, we know, but the reality is that in order for positive change to take place, we have to embody that change.

Being able to have a cordial conversation is important, even with those who have opposing viewpoints. It takes both parties to have such an exchange, but people shouldn’t wait for the other side to extend the olive branch, they should take the lead on that. If you enter into a discussion coming from an approach that it’s important to hear people out and get to know what their point of view is, then the conversation is already headed in a positive direction. If you start out girding yourself against their “terrible” opinions, then it’s already going to a negative place.

It’s important to realize that everybody comes to their opinion for a reason or reasons. Their background has shaped them into the person they are, formulating thoughts about certain subjects based on their experience — or lack thereof. They may have a very good reason — for them, which may not apply to you — to feel the way they do. Something that makes complete sense to one person can seem completely illogical to another.

Starting a conversation by giving a little bit of background about where you’re coming from is another good way to be able to talk with someone about sensitive subjects. In doing so, you lay the foundation for a cordial conversation, even if you wind up agreeing to disagree. That is an important note, as well, that even considerate, honest dialogue may not change someone else’s perception. In that instance, respect that the person is not going to change and expect them to respect you for not changing.

Being able to talk about touchy things is the only way for us to move past the challenges facing our country and community, because not talking about leads to lesser solutions — or none at all — that don’t fully address issues. So, when you get ready to write that letter to the editor, think about how those on the other side of an issue feel. When you get ready to speak out at a meeting, think about common ground that can be found with those that have an opposing viewpoint.

We’ll all be better off if we can talk with each other without shouting.