DEAR HARRIETTE: One of my girlfriends presents herself as very helpful and generous, almost like a Girl Scout or something, even though she is a grown woman. I spent the day with her recently, and she was always at the ready with whatever we needed. The problem, though, was that she wanted to share everything. For instance, we went to a three-hour event, and she brought water, which she immediately offered to share with me. I thought that was nice in theory, but I do not think it is wise to share drinks with people. It turns out that she does things like that a lot, which means, in my mind anyway, that she is thinking about herself rather than being a Scout for both of us. Ultimately I found this annoying. How can I have a better perspective about her behavior in the future? – Not So Scouty, Syracuse, New York

DEAR NOT SO SCOUTY: If you hang out with this woman again, before you depart for your adventure, ask her what provisions she is bringing for the day. Since you know that she thinks ahead, pick her brain on the front end so that you can prepare accordingly if you like, rather than silently bemoaning the fact that you aren’t ready later in the day.

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DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been hanging out with the same group of women for years. They are definitely my besties. We are all in our 40s. We go on vacations together, we go out to dinner and to concerts and we generally have a great time. The downside is that none of us has a man in our lives. I lived with a guy for a few years and we had talked of getting married, but he recently left. I enjoy my time with my female friends, but I really do want a man in my life. What do I need to do differently? – Surrounded by Women, Detroit

DEAR SURROUNDED BY WOMEN: In order to attract a man, you have to first make space for him. No, you do not need to dump your girlfriends, but if you are always with them at all the fun events and whenever you are out and about, you likely do not look available to the single men out there.

Develop a new strategy. Choose to go to a fun event solo. You may even decide to go on a vacation by yourself. Consider activities that interest you that you believe men also enjoy. Decide to put yourself in that environment sometimes. The goal is to separate yourself from your pack of women so that you can be noticed solo. Also, I think you should consider international opportunities to meet men. We live in a big world, and there many be someone out there just waiting to meet you – somewhere else.

— Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to [email protected] or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.