DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a college student who made an etiquette mistake with my professor: I said “hi” to him when greeting him. He reprimanded me in front of a class of 50 people, saying I am to always say “hello” to the professor. He told me he did not get a doctorate for me to address him using “hi” as a greeting. I found this to be so rude, especially as he was lecturing me on how to be polite while embarrassing me in front of my classmates. After class, other students came up to me and called my professor names to make me feel better.

I’m not sure how to continue to be an active student in this class when the professor thinks he is above his students. Is it time to just be a face in the crowd? I was trying to be an active participant until this incident. – Sad Student, New Orleans

DEAR SAD STUDENT: Drum up the courage to schedule a private meeting with your professor. During the meeting, apologize for speaking to him in a too-familiar manner. Then let him know that the way that he reprimanded you in front of the class was terribly embarrassing; plus, it backfired because many students felt compelled to speak derogatorily about him in defense of you. Tell him how hard it is for you to come to talk about this, but the reason you did was that you really want to be active in your class. Right now you feel uncomfortable about speaking up ever again.

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DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been getting daily nosebleeds for months now. I finally went to the doctor and was told that I need to get surgery to correct my deviated septum, which is causing the bleeding. Whenever my co-workers or family ask me about my upcoming surgery, they act like I am trying to cover up the fact that I am getting a nose job! My nose will not change in appearance at all after this surgery, and I am getting tired of people thinking I am using a fake medical excuse to get work done. I do not even want to interact with people who think I’m being sly about getting plastic surgery. I am fixing a medical problem and have just resorted to snapping at people. There are medical reasons for getting surgery on your nose! – The Nose Knows, Los Angeles

DEAR THE NOSE KNOWS: You live in a town where cosmetic surgery is commonplace, so your friends and family may actually think you are being unnecessarily shy about “concealing” your plan for such surgery. Even so, you should not have to constantly remind anyone of your medical challenge. Instead, stop talking about it. Confide in one person who you think believes you and is responsible. Ask that person to be in touch during the period of your surgery and its aftermath. If you need support, make him or her your go-to person and leave the others out of it.

— Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to [email protected] or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.