DEAR HARRIETTE: I have never been particularly interested in nautical life. For Memorial Day, I was invited to sail with friends, and I accepted the offer. As the boat was navigating the waters, the owner of the boat needed help with the ropes and sails. I helped out where I could and thought this would be the end of it.

Now I am receiving invitations to sail with the boat owner. Honestly, I don’t like how much work has to be done to get the boat on its way. The engine is shut off for the majority of the ride, and there is just too much to do for me to enjoy the sailing. The constant wondering about knots, ropes and sails doesn’t intrigue me whatsoever. I prefer a ride that doesn’t involve the boat constantly tipping with the wind.

I think it’s a bit crass to simply reply “I don’t like sailboats” as a way to deny these invitations. Should I tell a white lie or pretend I have plans instead of being honest? I would hope he’d pick up the hint after the seventh or eighth time. – Not Rockin’ With the Ocean, Baltimore

DEAR NOT ROCKIN’ WITH THE OCEAN: If you truly do not want to learn more about the sailing life and possibly grow to love it, tell the truth. Contact the boat owner. Thank him for the invitation and admit that sailing is not your thing. He probably did not sense that since you put your all into it. Let him know, and he should stop asking.

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DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend wants to take a break from me. After a heated argument, he told me that he wanted to take a break. I freaked out and accused him of trying to see other people. He clarified that he just wanted a break from talking to me.

I don’t want to just leave our relationship on this note for now. I want to talk everything out, but he’s been ignoring me for 24 hours. I can’t believe he decided to take a break from me without my agreement. We’ve been together for almost 3 years. I think he should just hold on because I know we can work this out. How do I get my boyfriend to stop ignoring me? – Phone Isn’t Buzzing, Staten Island, New York

DEAR PHONE ISN’T BUZZING: As much as you want to talk to him right now, it is clear that he doesn’t want to talk to you. Rather than pushing him to pick up the phone, stand down. Whatever happened between you has caused him to retreat. Perhaps you should take this period to reflect on what sparked the argument, what your role is in it, what his role is in it, and where you would like to take your relationship.

It could be as simple as having some time apart from each other. But it could easily be that you two have reached an impasse. Healing your bond may require more listening and less talking. For sure, you cannot get your boyfriend to do anything until he is ready. Be still and listen to the voice inside for answers.

— Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to [email protected] or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.