DEAR HARRIETTE: My ex-fiancee and I left off on a bad note. She walked in on me being unfaithful, and I don’t think I can ever unsee the hurt in her eyes. We never got closure, and she refuses to speak to me since that horrible night.

I obviously have regrets about what happened, but now I am just focused on making sure she is safe and OK. I find myself driving by her house or parking in front a few times a day just to see if she’s doing all right. Her flowers are watered, she’s frequently in and out of the house and I don’t think she’s had many people over. I can’t bring myself to stop checking on her house. Is this wrong? I feel like as long as it does not negatively impact her life, it is OK if I cruise by. – Guardian Angel, Teaneck, New Jersey

DEAR GUARDIAN ANGEL: I hate to tell you this, but your ex would probably think of you more as a stalker than an angel. You betrayed her trust, and now you are lurking around “watching over her.” This is not a good idea.

Sadly, you made a huge mistake that has cost you this relationship. You see that she is doing fine and living her life. It is time for you to move on and live yours. You have some inner work to do so that you can evaluate your choices. Why did you cheat on your fiancee? What do you want in the future in terms of a relationship? Do you believe you can be faithful in future relationships? Figure out where your head is so that you are ready for what lies ahead. Meanwhile, leave your ex alone.

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DEAR HARRIETTE: I come from a traditional Italian family. For generations, the husbands have always worked while the wives took care of the children and had dinner ready at the end of the day. My wife has begun talking about opening up a store in our town. I don’t want my wife to work and invest her money in this store. I keep telling her that retail is down and she might lose her money, but she can’t stop thinking about opening up her own store.

I want my wife to stay home with our children and cook dinner. With this new store idea, it looks like I won’t be able to have home-cooked meals anymore. How can I persuade my wife to be rational and do what is best for the family? – Happy Wife Means Happy Life, Brooklyn, New York

DEAR HAPPY WIFE MEANS HAPPY LIFE: What you really need to do is have a talk with your wife about values and the changing roles that she is considering for the family. She clearly is not happy with the status quo. She is pleading with you for your blessing for her to try something new. Talk about what that might look like. How can the family figure out how to give her space to try this enterprise and keep hot meals on the table? If you are willing to look at your life differently, the two of you may be able to figure this out.

And remember: If you want home-cooked meals, you could always cook them yourself.

— Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to [email protected] or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.