DEAR HARRIETTE: My son goes to a boarding school a few hours away from home. I am very proud of his improvements, and he has made many friends. My son primarily has foreign friends who are international students. Since he is the boy closest to home, he has invited five international friends to stay at our home for a long weekend.

I am preparing to sell my home, and teenage boys aren’t always the cleanest people – especially six of them. How can I tell my son that he can’t invite so many friends over? I feel horrible excluding some children who can’t go home. – International B&B, Syracuse, New York

DEAR INTERNATIONAL B&B: If at all possible, do not make your son choose among his friends. Since they are far away from home, these boys need to feel connected and cared for, not rejected or hand-picked. Instead, make clear ground rules. Decide on areas of the house where they can be and areas that are off-limits. Explain this to your son first, and then when the boys arrive, tell the group what you expect. Explain that you are selling your house, so you need them to respect it. Then monitor them.

Sure, they will probably be a bit messy. But if the area where they hang out is clearly defined, including the yard, if you have one, you should be able to manage them without too much of a cleanup job on the back end.

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DEAR HARRIETTE: I went over to a new friend’s house for dinner a few weeks ago. In all honesty, I was served a horrible meal. Practically everything was burnt and over-seasoned. This was clearly not intentional, and I find it so endearing that she went to such lengths to put together the meal. However, I keep getting invited back. Instead, I try to steer the group toward restaurants. I love the company. I just prefer to enjoy my meal as well. Is it wrong of me to keep pushing for restaurants as opposed to a (burnt) home-cooked meal? – New Friendships, Dallas

DEAR NEW FRIENDSHIPS: You are going to have to address the elephant in the room. This can be hurtful and awkward, so you do have to be careful. The next time your friend suggests hosting a dinner, offer to help her make the meal, or suggest that it be potluck. This can open the conversation for you to carefully and honestly express your concerns. If she says, “No, thank you,” to helping with the meal, let her know how much you appreciate her offer, but that you have some dietary restrictions and can better manage that in a restaurant or if you help cook.

Or you could be way more direct while using humor, and tell your friend that you love her company, but you don’t love her cooking. Tell her that you appreciate her invitation. From there, you can offer to help her cook so that the burden isn’t solely on her.

— Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to [email protected] or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.