“Back to school,
Back to school,
To prove to Dad that I’m not a fool.”

— Billy Madison

Billy Madison’s a character probably better recognized by people of a certain generation – mine. 

Thirty-somethings that came of age in that analog-to-digital gap between Gen Xers and Millenials most likely recall the 1995 Adam Sandler classic in which his spoiled, adult character had to repeat every school grade over again to prove to his wealthy father his capability of running a large company.

Or really as the kids today call it, adulting.

It’s a mindless slapstick with a smattering of SNL alumni and a healthy dose of jokes typical of any flick with a Chris Farley cameo.

Yet somehow the movie’s become relevant once again, finding its way back to my mind’s forefront years after potty talk movies were long replaced by potty training focus.

When you take the crassness from ‘Billy Madison’, there’s actually something interesting there.
What if we, as parents, could go back and study some of the reading, ‘riting, ‘rithmetic basics all over again in a quickity-quick crash course?

Did we coast through elementary years too quickly, giving a mere backward glance toward subjects for which we had little interest or passion? Well I did. More specifically, the ‘rithmetic part.
Do I wish to go back and repeat those grammar school days? No way.

But how I’d love to glean once more some of those lessons that weren’t so captivating to me then as they are now.

How I appreciate history, geography, science – now that I’m an adult and no longer toting around a 35-pound, overstuffed L.L. Bean backpack, passing notes ornately folded into football origami.

What? That’s what we did before texting.

My university campus was nestled among famous, historical mansions.

As students, we had free passes to jaunt through them any time we liked.

I never did take advantage of the generously given opportunity then, despite my degree’s heavy focus on architecture and art history courses, but my husband and I returned years later and finally took the tours – at full ticket cost. 

Adulting at last, at a price.

I often catch myself deliberating I wished I’d been more psyched for certain classes while I was taking them, rather than begrudging heavy textbooks I’d stare at from my bedroom desk, hoping their words would absorb from within the text’s worn spine into my brain without my extra effort.

As it happens, perhaps we can get that second chance.

Not necessarily at absorbing Quantam Physics via ESP, but to re-ignite a love of learning.

And when you’re a parent, you’re back in school – like it or not.

This time around, I choose to like it.

Not only because I am finally as enthusiastic about learning as richly as my son is, but because if I don’t, my six-year-old’s going to surpass my math skills before I can say Greatest Common Factor.

I can keep up with him now, but when algebra rears its ugly square root head, it will be just as challenging for me.

I’ve been given a second chance, to get schooled vicariously through my first-grader.
To all parents of school-aged kiddos, you are, too.

Whether or not you were a scholarly NHS inductee yourself – and kudos to you if you were – you’ll soak up grade school factoids about world history and science theories all over again.

This second time around – and the succeeding times to come as my younger kiddos step into school themselves – I’m truly riveted by the opportunity to consume grammar school lessons all over again.

Because I can appreciate it this time.

I guess the teachers were right – you do apply what you study to every day life.

Love gardening? Thank botany. 

Keep a budget and pay bills? So there was a reason for all that math. Well I’ll be.

I get it now.

So bring on those pencils and books.

I’m ready to soak up what I leafed through last time, Cliff’s Notes-style.

Time to get schooled, y’all, alongside my school-kid.

I’ve been saved by the bell. 

— Michelle Cote is creative director of the Journal Tribune and a nationally-syndicated columnist. Rocking out to classics in her minivan with husband and three sons is totally her jam. Contact her at [email protected].