I don’t believe it and many that know me won’t believe it as well. I went shopping on Black Friday. I didn’t get up at midnight and I didn’t stand in line for 24 hours before the store opened. I might seem crazy but I am not insane, at least not yet.

I just might achieve that status if Congress does nothing to stop America from going over the fiscal cliff and then decides in mid-January that they need to rescue middle-class Americans in January so members will look like superheroes to the voters without a clue who put them in office in the first place.

To be truthful, I have never liked Christmas shopping in the first place. I grew up poor and thinking the bobby pins I bought my mother were the greatest present ever invented or at least it seemed that way. Then the unthinkable happened when my father purchased an artificial Christmas tree. Of course, in those early days of American history, artificial Christmas trees only came in one color and that certainly wasn’t green.

My mother was totally unimpressed by the silver Christmas tree now standing in her living room. It must have been such an advanced technology that she didn’t realize it didn’t need watering and would not catch fire. She reached her limit of self-control when my father wanted to cover the tree, decorations and lights included, with a sheet and put it into storage intact. Believe me, that tree didn’t survive in our house for very long.

Congress, on the other hand, could have given all Americans a wonderful Christmas present by extending the so-called Bush tax cuts for a period of time, say a period long enough for my wife and I to move out of the country before total socialism or communism takes hold. It is obvious that Democrats want to rob the rich while fooling the poor into believing they aren’t next to have their wallets rummaged through.

The Republicans have their heads stuck where the sun doesn’t shine and have become totally clueless as to why they were severely trounced in the last election. Maybe, just maybe, America would have been better off electing Weird Al Yankovic as president. If you don’t know who he is, you might just be better off than those who do. Google him and you will find the perfect example of the average American voter of the past election.

One Christmas present that all businesses, especially those who sell gasoline, could give us is prices that match other areas of Maine. My wife and I spent our Christmas bonus at the Oxford Casino last week. Oops, we were foolishly hoping we would come home with a bonus. Instead, we didn’t have any money to spend locally last Saturday at local businesses.

Although it was disappointing to lose money at the casino, it was highly upsetting to see gasoline prices 20 cents per gallon lower as we progressed north on Route 26 to the casino. We did attempt to enjoy the free entertainment when we left the casino as a gentlemen became irate (putting it very mildly and without the numerous vulgar words) when he tried to leave the casino with a cup of coffee in his hand. I have to surmise that it was presumed he would throw the cup away in the parking lot and I thought he was about to place the cup of black coffee, to be nice, in a place where the sun doesn’t shine. Maybe that’s how the term Black Friday came about.

I forgot to mention where I went shopping on Black Friday in Windham. I would tell the reader where it was but my doctor would suspect that the suet I bought was for plum pudding and not birds.

Lane Hiltunen of Windham has decided he would rather pay 20 cents less for a gallon of gasoline instead of being gouged by stations in Windham.

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