May 25, 2013: Bowdoin College Commencement. Rai Miller, a psychology major/sociology minor from Birmingham, Alabama, gave an inspiring speech entitled, “Rising from Fear: The Unyielding Power of Self Belief.” She spoke first about her mother’s unwavering belief in her and her brother. Rai then admitted that her own confidence had been shaken during her early years at Bowdoin. “Fear took over; the fear of letting my family down, of not belonging at such a prestigious college, of not being as intelligent as my peers.”

One Sunday while surfing the internet to avoid working on a paper, Rai came across a quote by Andre Lord, a Caribbean-American writer and activist. “When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less important whether I am afraid.”

Rai recalled that thought when a visiting speaker came to her psychology seminar; he was the man who had written the book they had been reading. Each student was expected to come prepared with three questions for the speaker. Rai overcame her fear and posed her questions, which seemed to impress the man. She went up to him after class to get her book signed, and he said, ”I was very impressed with your question today. You were able to grapple with the concepts of my book in a way no one else has done before. The way you articulate your thoughts is very melodic. It commands the attention of others. You should be proud. Keep it up.”

Fueled by that high praise, Rai has definitely “kept it up” since graduating from Bowdoin. She earned a Fulbright grant to teach English in Indonesia; then spent a second year in Indonesia working for Fulbright; and later went on to earn a Masters in Educational Psychology and a Ph.D. in Counseling Psychology at Oklahoma State University.

May 29, 2021: Bowdoin College Commencement. Ruby Ahaiwe, a biochemistry major/Francophone Studies minor from Abuja, Nigeria, gave an inspiring speech entitled, “Your Eyes Have Seen Me.” She explained that the title of her speech came from the Ibo word for love, “ahuru m qi n’caya.” Translated that means, “I see you in the eye.”

Ruby joked that while her Nigerian father had encouraged her to find a husband at Bowdoin, she had found something more important. She found herself, thanks to the love she felt from the many people who looked her in the eye and accepted her.

Ruby concluded her speech by saying, “Today, I invite you all to keep love deeply rooted in your hearts, to pause, to listen, and to truly see others in your eyes. As we leave Brunswick, I encourage you to use your education and opportunities, to see others, to build communities, and to leave the world better than you met it.”

A back story ties together these two remarkable young woman, these two first-generation college students who blossomed at Bowdoin to became real leaders and inspirational speakers. When Rai, our host student, was at Bowdoin, she often met with an upperclass mentor named Awa Diaw, who was born in Senegal before her parents moved to New York City. Awa’s younger brother Mamadou, Bowdoin Class of 2020, became our host student. During his second year at Bowdoin, Mamadou was the proctor in the residence hall where Ruby lived during her first year. (He’s also been living our house for the last 15 months, while he works for Fidelity Investments remotely)

It gets better. Rai Miller currently works in the Counseling Office at Johns Hopkins University in Baltimore. Ruby Abaiwe will begin her studies at the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health in September. We happened to meet Ruby while waiting in line at Gelato Fiasco in Brunswick, a lucky happenstance since I’d intended to connect Ruby with Rai.

I told Ruby about Rai and later called Rai to tell her about Ruby. Rai was delighted to hear this news and promised to show Ruby some good Polar Bear love when she comes to Johns Hopkins.

David Treadwell, a Brunswick writer, welcomes commentary and suggestions for future “Just a Little Old” columns. dtreadw575@aol.com.(David’s latest book co-authored with Anneka Williams, who graduated from Bowdoin College this past May, is entitled, “A Flash Fiction Exchange Between Methuselah and the Maiden: Sixty Stories to While Away the Hours,” is available at Gulf of Maine books (Brunswick) Mockingbird Books (Bath) or on Amazon.)

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