Most kids who play sports, even those who may not be gifted or competitive, have fun. Competition and fun are not incompatible. While most kids understand good sportsmanship, I am astonished at kids who are just plain mean, ruining the fun for others. Whether it’s to the kid who is not as good or who didn’t make the travel team, making derogatory comments is wrong and has lasting effects. I’m not talking about good-natured, trash-talking. There’s a difference.

Why don’t more coaches and parents teach these kids to be supportive of and kind to those who may be less skilled or not as good, but still love playing the sport? Our ice hockey coach reinforced these principles by doing a team-building event rather than playing a game when he saw poor behaviors from some team members. These kids need to learn that even when they are “good” or “competitive,” it serves no purpose to denigrate another person. Being competitive does not mean belittling an opponent or a teammate who may not be as good.

Why isn’t the first thing a player thinks: How can I help my teammate get better? We focus so much on getting the kids on a travel team or going to an elite sports camp. Why not spend a day, or practice, teaching critical behaviors of kindness and encouragement?

Before a young player says something hurtful, coaches and parents should tell them to think: are their words true, helpful, inspiring, necessary and kind?

Greg Unfricht
Freeport

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