The Jersey Joe Italian from The Crooked Mile in Portland. Photo by Aimsel Ponti Photo by Aimsel Ponti

I’ve been a huge fan of the Jersey Joe Italian from The Crooked Mile in Portland’s Old Port for at least 15 years. It’s the only thing I’ve ever ordered there because its gravitational pull is irresistible, thanks to a thick stack of cold cuts.

I can’t help it. The sandwich is tremendous, and this Italian gal is very here for it.

At the end of “Jaws 2,” Roy Scheider’s Chief Brody character compels the great white shark to “open wide” as he serves up a huge electrical cord that ends the shark’s life when the beast bites down on it. I’m that shark because I had to open my jaw as wide as possible to be able to take a bite out of the Jersey Joe. I died a different kind of the death though – one that didn’t put me 6 feet under, but rather into a blissful food coma that ended with my signature line of “I can’t believe I ate the whole thing.”

I’m not kidding when I said I had to open wide, because the Jersey Joe is piled high with ham, salami, pepperoni, provolone, lettuce, tomato, onion, mayo, red wine vinaigrette and oregano-bedazzled romaine.

Funny thing about pepperoni; I’m typically not a fan and never have it on a pizza. But the pepperoni they use at The Crooked Mile is in bigger slices than the half-dollar sized bag ones from the market. They’re more salami-sized and, in this instance, give the sandwich a kick of spice that I adore.

I’m a hold-the-tomatoes eater, but that didn’t change the density of this sandwich, which was served on a baguette. The baguette, in fact, is my preferred sandwich bread, as it’s similar to the Italian bread of my youth from Pappy’s and Tripoli bakeries in Lawrence, Massachusetts, next to my hometown of Andover. Squishy sandwich rolls aren’t my love language, but crusty, crunchy ones certainly are.

Every sandwich and salad from The Crooked Mile comes with either an apple or bag of chips. Surely I don’t need to tell you which option I chose.

The Jersey Joe Italian, $14.50, The Crooked Mile, 8 Milk St., Portland. Thecrookedmilecafe.com

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